Jun
18
Better Behavior for Kids
Filed Under Parent Resources, Preschoolers, Toddler | 1 Comment
I’ve come across a website that has a wonderful new approach to bettering your child’s behavior. My 4 year old seems to be in a tantrum phase, so I could really use some help! I’ve ordered one of these unique behavior wheels and I can’t wait for it to arrive. Your child actually HELPS you decide on the punishment they should receive for common behavior problems! It is even customizable if you need help for a specific challenge your child is having problems with.
I will update you all when I’ve received it and have started using it. I just couldn’t wait to share it with you though since it really sounds like a unique and helpful tool!
Why Spank When You Can Spin?
The Better Behavior Wheel is an upbeat, fun, and totally unique approach
to child behavior management that’s delighting parents everywhere.
If you have kids, you NEED the Wheel!
Jun
18
YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE: A UNITED, UNMOVABLE FRONT
Filed Under Quick Tips, Teens, Toddler | Leave a Comment
You and your spouse need to convey to your children, through your words and actions, that you’re together on your decisions and they can’t pit one parent against the other. And they need to understand that when you’ve made a decision, all their arguing and fussing will not change that decision. How do you do that? Before handing down decisions to your children, make sure you and your spouse are in agreement about that decision. (And be sure to do this somewhere that your children aren’t privy to your discussion!) Then, once that decision has been given to the children, make sure you don’t cave under the pressure of their arguing. In our home, when one of the kids asks us for something (say, permission to go to a friend’s house for the night), we take time to think about our response. Once we give it, we don’t change it. Our philosophy is to say yes whenever possible - they hear “no” often enough, and if we can say yes, why not! But when we say no, we don’t change our minds just because they don’t like the answer. If you and your spouse give careful thought to your responses and provide a united, unmovable front, your children will soon stop trying to pit one parent against the other, and will begin to understand that arguing with a ruling is futile.
Jun
16
Controlling Toddler Temper Tantrums
Filed Under Quick Tips, Toddler | Leave a Comment
Quick Tip- Distraction: A Parent’s Best Friend
While their is no one answer to stop your toddler’s flaring temper tantrum or tears that are about to go out of control, one of the most recommended techniques is distraction. Little things such as “Hey! Look at that weird bug!” or snapping a sudden photo of the child can provide just enough distraction to nip the out-of-control aspects of things in the bud.
Anther tip to tame your pint sized monster is the tried and true “Time Out”. Usually, when put in “time out” my temper tantrum throwing toddler emerges from “time out” the perfect little angel.
Time Out doesn’t work well when you are out and about though! One trick that I have recently started using is to ask my son “I know you are a really good boy, but the people here in the restaurant don’t know you, you don’t want them to think you are a naughty boy do you?” I’ve tried this three times in the last week or two and it seems to be working quite well. If the server is nice I use him or her as the person that might not think well of my son. He seems to care about what others think at this stage so I think I’ve hit on a great technique.
Jun
12
Saying Yes to Your Kids
Filed Under Quick Tips, Teens | Leave a Comment
Quick Tip - Teen parenting advice:
“The next time your child asks you something that ordinarily would respond in a hearty, NO, stop and remember this axiom of parenting… “Say no when you have to and yes when you can.” For instance, let’s say Jane wants to dye her hair a lovely shade of fuchsia. She’s got the money to do it and “all my friends are doing it, too.” Now, you know that more than likely she’s going to hate it, and you will probably hate it, too. But think about it… Is this an action that is going to cause her any kind of physical harm? Will it have a long-term impact on her mental health? Some of her peers will likely make fun of her, but she can always dye her hair back, or wait for it to grow out. Think of it as a learning experience. Not every general wins every battle. The goal is to win the war… to turn out a basically good kid who has the tools to be healthy, happy and gainfully employed eventually. And every good general knows sometimes you have to give up some less important ground in order to achieve victory in the long run. Sometimes it can even be fun to give in on something silly. Maybe it’s having dessert before dinner, or letting them stay up late on a school night to watch a movie with you that you can talk about the next day.”
-Kelly P.
Now Personally, My son’s only 4 so I don’t know I will feel when he’s a teen, but I think the outrageous hair color would not be something I could handle, but the principle is the same. Your focus is to win the war not the battle. You want your teens to learn to make correct choices later in life, so they need to experiment with smaller decisions on their own as a teen (and learn that sometimes they might regret quick decisions). Otherwise they won’t know how their decisions will effect them when they make big choices.
Jun
10
Show Interest In Your Child’s Day
Filed Under Quick Tips, Teens, Toddler | Leave a Comment
Another wonderful tip: Daily talks about their day.
“From age three to adult Start young talking to your children about all the events of their day. I started with my kids at ages 3 or 4 when they went of to Mother’s Day out and preschool. Every day, it became a part of our daily ritual for my kids to tell me all about their day. For me to ask questions was normal. So, by the time they became teenagers, they still looked forward to telling me all about their day and were never resistant to any questions I had. They knew I’ve always been interested in them. They trusted me. So, now we still talk all the time. I’m the one they tell everything to–even more than their best friends. I don’t judge them. I tell them what I think because they have always heard my respnse to their day. But even if they do things I don’t like or approve of, they still feel a need to tell me everything.”
-Kathrine